Turns Out, I’m Not Italian. But Honestly, That’s the Least of My Chaos...

 

Intro

Look, if there’s one thing I’ve learned about family, it’s that nothing ever goes the way you think it will.

For years, I confidently believed I was Italian. The traditions, the food, the slightly dramatic hand gestures. 🤌Then one day, I found out my mom was adopted, and BAM!! I was not Italian anymore. 

Turns out, identity is weird.

Turns out, family is even weirder.

I didn’t meet my dad until I was 25, so growing up, I never had the full picture of where I came from. And honestly? I’m still figuring it out.

But Forget Identity.....Let’s Talk About Survival Mode

At 31, I’m a stay-at-home mom managing two kids, full-time caregiving for my grandfather-in-law, and a husband who can’t resist adding to our household zoo—leaving me in charge of an ever-expanding parade of pets.

I swear, every time I turn around, there’s a new creature added to the family. He works full-time to provide for us, which means while he’s off being a responsible adult, I’m over here wrangling kids and feeding a small zoo.

At this point, I’ve accepted my fate. I am not just a mom. I am an unpaid caregiver, short-order cook, and now, a reluctant zookeeper.

Some days, I’m crushing it like a superhero. Other days, I’m sitting in my car, on the verge of tears, because the chicken’s still frozen, and dinner has officially become a mystery.

Caregiving teaches you patience (sometimes). It teaches you adaptability (always). It teaches you that love doesn’t look like fancy speeches. It looks like constant appointment reminders, making sure meds are given, and figuring out why the dog is suddenly limping,  why the cat started puking this week, or wondering if the newest addition (baby squirrel) will survive, oh and why there is a bat in my cats mouth, INSIDE THE HOUSE!

New "Rehabber"

BAT- that was safely released

It’s messy, exhausting, and deeply meaningful.

So, What Do I Do With All This?

I started writing.

I write about the traditions I’m holding onto. The ones that actually matter. I write about the ones I’ve let go of because, honestly, some of them were just stressful for no reason. I write about parenting, marriage, family, and the absolutely unhinged rollercoaster that is adulthood.

Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that family isn’t about who you came from, it’s about who shows up.

That’s the legacy I’m building. The one my kids will carry forward, the one that proves love isn’t about labels, heritage, or perfection. It’s about showing up, in whatever form that takes.

So, welcome to my corner of the internet, where I overshare, embrace the chaos, and attempt to keep my household functioning while living among a growing number of furry, feathered, and (probably someday) scaly housemates. 

Embracing Family, Acceptance, and the Power of Connection

Background

Growing up, I never knew my father, and I had little involvement with my paternal grandparents throughout my childhood. My mom kept in touch with my grandparents, and they always showed up for my sister and me, especially on birthdays, bringing a sense of connection. I carried curiosity about them, eager to understand where I came from, even as unanswered questions lingered.

As an adult, I’ve started uncovering the truths behind my childhood, choosing to reconnect with my father, and now exploring the possibility of meeting my half-siblings. Though I have moments of doubt, I’m staying optimistic and hopeful. Recently, I learned of my grandmother’s declining health and her transition to hospice. my husband has been nothing but supportive, so we gathered the kids and went on a short trip to their home in the next town over. 

A Fulfilling Visit That Changed Everything

I stepped through the door, greeted by the warmth of my paternal grandparents' home. Thanks to my mother and other grandmothers’ efforts to keep our family connected over the years, we had many heartfelt visits at my childhood home. But this visit felt different. My grandmother, now in hospice care, was declining quickly, and I knew that these moments together were fleeting.

Grandpa

My grandfather, the person I named my son after, is the kind of person who leaves a lasting impression with his quick wit and charm. He’s a natural talker, able to lighten any room with his humor and heartfelt conversations. Faithful and devoted, he has always been a pillar of strength for his family, embodying hard work and resilience in everything he does. Whether tending to his responsibilities or caring for my grandmother with unmatched dedication, he continues to inspire me with his steadfast love and unwavering commitment to those he holds dear.

Devoted Love💘

I arrived with a small stack of photos in hand, unsure of how the visit would unfold. My grandfather, always steady, humorous, and strong, had been watching over my grandmother with unwavering devotion as she navigated these final stages of life. But the moment he saw the pictures, his entire face lit up—eyes sparkling, posture shifting as if those memories breathed new life into him.

One photo stood out. An 8x10 of him and Grandma dancing at my wedding, frozen in a moment of pure joy and love. He held it with the kind of reverence reserved for treasures, his fingers tracing the edges as if he could step back into that day.

They have been madly in love for over fifty years—passionately, fiercely, in a way that defies time. And even now, as Grandma grows frail, he cares for her with the same tenderness as ever. Watching him ensure her comfort, anticipate her needs before she even speaks, and love her through every stage has been nothing short of inspiring.

I thought, what a powerful reminder of love’s unwavering strength—the way it evolves, adapts, and remains constant even through life’s most difficult transitions. It reshaped my perspective on family, devotion, and the importance of being present for the people who matter most, no matter the stage of life. It also connected deeply to something I’ve written about before—how my husband’s family shares the same commitment to showing up, inspiring me to be more intentional in how I do the same. related post 🠊 https://navigatinglifewithruthie.blogspot.com/2025/04/caring-for-grandpa-navigating-regret.html 

Grandma 💕

As I sat beside her, holding her fragile hand, memories of birthdays, holidays, and childhood laughter flooded back. This was the woman who had always been there at my Birthday parties, even as my relationship with my father remained uncertain. She embodies so much of what I cherish about family. She has always been such a beautiful woman, both inside and out—her kindness and warmth radiate in everything she does. She has this wonderful sense of humor and an easygoing, quiet nature, always willing to listen and effortlessly going along with whatever my grandfather says. I found it particularly funny when she would roll her eyes at the stories my grandfather would tell at our family dinners. 😂 She’s also creative and artsy, a quality I see reflected in myself, which makes me feel even more connected to her. Even as she grows frail, watching her in these moments reminds me of the incredible legacy of love, laughter, and creativity she'll be leaving behind.

Dad

And then, there was my father—someone I had only met in 2019. He has faced his own internal battles, ones that have shaped his presence in my life in profound ways. His journey has been complicated, filled with highs and lows, moments of clarity and others clouded by struggle. Yet here he was, sharing space with us, meeting Elizabeth for the first time. 

My father is an intelligent man with a gift for conversation and a strong work ethic. He has the ability to excel in his work, earning well and showcasing his skills, but he has faced struggles within himself that have created barriers along the way. Despite his hard work and potential, the setbacks he’s experienced have made it difficult for him to get ahead. Yet, his resilience and drive continue to shine through, and I’ve come to appreciate the layers of complexity that make him who he is.

Conclusion

This was more than just a visit—it was a moment of acceptance, a reminder that family doesn’t always fit into perfect molds, but it can still offer love, connection, and meaning in ways we never imagined, IF you let it.

Can you relate? Please tell me your story!

Calm in the Chaos: My Journey to Managing Stress

    

Stress—it's the uninvited guest that turns up at every party, especially when you're hosting the circus of family life. From mismatched socks to missed deadlines, it seems to find a way to creep into every corner of my day. But over time, I’ve learned a few tricks to tame the beast (or at least, to coexist with it).

Step 1: Naming the Beast

Recognizing stress is the first step. For me, it’s the tight feeling in my chest or the moment I start snapping at my husband (sorry, babe). Just calling it out—“Hey, stress, I see you”—can be surprisingly freeing. 

Step 2: The Power of Small Wins

When life feels overwhelming, I aim for tiny victories. Like organizing one messy drawer or savoring my coffee while it’s still hot (rare). These small moments remind me that even during all the chaos, there's room for calm.

Step 3: Finding My Happy Place😊

For me, it’s writing—pouring my thoughts onto paper feels like hitting reset. Whether it’s blogging about sibling shenanigans or crafting to-do lists, creativity helps me redirect the energy that stress tries to hijack.

Step 4: Leaning on My Tribe

Family and friends aren't just for sharing laughs; they’re also my lifeline during tough times. A quick vent session with someone who understands (or a goofy moment with my kids) works wonders to lighten the load.

  Stress doesn’t disappear, but it doesn’t have to rule your life. It’s okay to pause, breathe, and admit you’re not perfect. In fact, embracing imperfection has been one of my greatest lessons. Every messy moment in my house reminds me that chaos and beauty go hand in hand.    

Tell me, how do you handle stress in your day-to-day life? 🤔

Share your tips, tricks, or stories in the comments!👇

 I’m always eager to learn from others, navigating life’s chaos!😁