Showing posts with label dad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dad. Show all posts

April 16, 2025

Embracing Family, Acceptance, and the Power of Connection

Background

Growing up, I never knew my father, and I had little involvement with my paternal grandparents throughout my childhood. My mom kept in touch with my grandparents, and they always showed up for my sister and me, especially on birthdays, bringing a sense of connection. I carried curiosity about them, eager to understand where I came from, even as unanswered questions lingered.

As an adult, I’ve started uncovering the truths behind my childhood, choosing to reconnect with my father, and now exploring the possibility of meeting my half-siblings. Though I have moments of doubt, I’m staying optimistic and hopeful. Recently, I learned of my grandmother’s declining health and her transition to hospice. my husband has been nothing but supportive, so we gathered the kids and went on a short trip to their home in the next town over. 

A Fulfilling Visit That Changed Everything

I stepped through the door, greeted by the warmth of my paternal grandparents' home. Thanks to my mother and other grandmothers’ efforts to keep our family connected over the years, we had many heartfelt visits at my childhood home. But this visit felt different. My grandmother, now in hospice care, was declining quickly, and I knew that these moments together were fleeting.

Grandpa

My grandfather, the person I named my son after, is the kind of person who leaves a lasting impression with his quick wit and charm. He’s a natural talker, able to lighten any room with his humor and heartfelt conversations. Faithful and devoted, he has always been a pillar of strength for his family, embodying hard work and resilience in everything he does. Whether tending to his responsibilities or caring for my grandmother with unmatched dedication, he continues to inspire me with his steadfast love and unwavering commitment to those he holds dear.

Devoted LoveπŸ’˜

I arrived with a small stack of photos in hand, unsure of how the visit would unfold. My grandfather, always steady, humorous, and strong, had been watching over my grandmother with unwavering devotion as she navigated these final stages of life. But the moment he saw the pictures, his entire face lit up—eyes sparkling, posture shifting as if those memories breathed new life into him.

One photo stood out. An 8x10 of him and Grandma dancing at my wedding, frozen in a moment of pure joy and love. He held it with the kind of reverence reserved for treasures, his fingers tracing the edges as if he could step back into that day.

They have been madly in love for over fifty years—passionately, fiercely, in a way that defies time. And even now, as Grandma grows frail, he cares for her with the same tenderness as ever. Watching him ensure her comfort, anticipate her needs before she even speaks, and love her through every stage has been nothing short of inspiring.

I thought, what a powerful reminder of love’s unwavering strength—the way it evolves, adapts, and remains constant even through life’s most difficult transitions. It reshaped my perspective on family, devotion, and the importance of being present for the people who matter most, no matter the stage of life. It also connected deeply to something I’ve written about before—how my husband’s family shares the same commitment to showing up, inspiring me to be more intentional in how I do the same. related post 🠊 https://navigatinglifewithruthie.blogspot.com/2025/04/caring-for-grandpa-navigating-regret.html 

Grandma πŸ’•

As I sat beside her, holding her fragile hand, memories of birthdays, holidays, and childhood laughter flooded back. This was the woman who had always been there at my Birthday parties, even as my relationship with my father remained uncertain. She embodies so much of what I cherish about family. She has always been such a beautiful woman, both inside and out—her kindness and warmth radiate in everything she does. She has this wonderful sense of humor and an easygoing, quiet nature, always willing to listen and effortlessly going along with whatever my grandfather says. I found it particularly funny when she would roll her eyes at the stories my grandfather would tell at our family dinners. πŸ˜‚ She’s also creative and artsy, a quality I see reflected in myself, which makes me feel even more connected to her. Even as she grows frail, watching her in these moments reminds me of the incredible legacy of love, laughter, and creativity she'll be leaving behind.

Dad

And then, there was my father—someone I had only met in 2019. He has faced his own internal battles, ones that have shaped his presence in my life in profound ways. His journey has been complicated, filled with highs and lows, moments of clarity and others clouded by struggle. Yet here he was, sharing space with us, meeting Elizabeth for the first time. 

My father is an intelligent man with a gift for conversation and a strong work ethic. He has the ability to excel in his work, earning well and showcasing his skills, but he has faced struggles within himself that have created barriers along the way. Despite his hard work and potential, the setbacks he’s experienced have made it difficult for him to get ahead. Yet, his resilience and drive continue to shine through, and I’ve come to appreciate the layers of complexity that make him who he is.

Conclusion

This was more than just a visit—it was a moment of acceptance, a reminder that family doesn’t always fit into perfect molds, but it can still offer love, connection, and meaning in ways we never imagined, IF you let it.



Can you relate? Please tell me your story!

April 03, 2025

Messy, Real, and Ours: My Family Story

 My family is loud, loving, and unapologetically real. We live in a house that’s never truly quiet, filled with laughter, occasional chaos, and moments that remind me that perfection is overrated. We are messy, imperfect, and deeply connected—and that’s exactly how I like it.

Meet the Family

  • My husband: The fiery one, the protector, the one who feels everything deeply and reacts just as intensely. He’s passionate, sometimes stubborn, but always present in his own way.
  • My kids: The energy in the house—the sibling duo that can go from fighting over crayons to hugging within seconds. They remind me daily that chaos and love are two sides of the same coin.
  • Me: The one trying to balance it all—wife, mom, caregiver, and storyteller. I’m learning to embrace the mess and find beauty in the everyday moments.

The Beautiful Chaos: What Family Looks Like in My Home
   Family, in our house, isn’t just about picture-perfect moments. It’s about the mess, the noise, and the undeniable love woven into everyday chaos.
  • It looks like… an explosion of toys across the floor, mismatched socks, shoes scattered by the front door no matter how many times I tell everyone to put them away, a kitchen counter crowded with half-finished projects, and my husband pacing, fired up over something completely trivial but undeniably important to him.
  • It sounds like… my kids shrieking over who had the toy first, my husband’s intense voice calling out for order, me trying to intervene while simultaneously stirring dinner, and somehow, through it all, the occasional bursts of laughter that remind me we’re doing okay.
  • It feels like… exhaustion mixed with fierce love, patience tested to its limits, and a deep knowing that even in the hardest moments, we’re building something real.

    Some days, it’s survival mode. The kids are screaming about who touched whose stuff, my husband’s fiery frustration fills the room, and I’m standing in the middle of it all with dinner boiling over on the stove. Other days, it’s all quiet chaos—random shoes scattered across the house, impromptu wrestling matches on the couch, and me frantically searching for a coffee mug that somehow got abducted by the kids. Every day feels like a beautiful mess, full of moments that range from hilariously absurd to deeply exhausting, but somehow, we always find our way back to love.
It’s in the wild debates over whether ranch dressing belongs on eggs (it doesn’t, for the record πŸ˜–), in the spontaneous dance parties in the living room, and in the fiery energy my husband brings that somehow anchors us even when it feels overwhelming. It’s imperfect, unpredictable, and occasionally downright chaotic. But at the end of every day—whether I’m scrubbing permanent marker off the walls or laughing at the complete circus we’ve created—I know this: this is home, this is us, and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.





The Fiery Parenting Duo: Finding Strength in Our Differences

 

Parenting, at its core, is a dance....a sometimes-chaotic, often-improvised, always-learning dance. 

And my husband and I? Well, let’s just say we bring some serious passion to the floor.

Take the other day, for example. The kids were in full meltdown mode, arguing over the same toy they’d ignored all week, while the house seemed to vibrate with the sheer volume of their voices. My husband, true to his fiery nature, jumped in, ready to bring order to the chaos with his strong, no-nonsense approach. I wanted to step in, soften the tension, and smooth things over the way I usually do. For a moment, we were out of sync....both frustrated and handling things in our own way.

But then, something clicked. I took a step back and realized that his intensity came from a place of care, of wanting to teach our kids lessons about fairness and respect. It’s not always the way I’d approach things, but that’s okay. Because where I bring calm, he brings energy. Where I offer patience, he offers conviction. Together, we create balance...not by being the same, but by embracing our differences.


This moment reminded me that parenting doesn’t have to be perfect or harmonious all the time. It’s about showing up, being present, and having each other’s backs, even when the dance gets a little messy. And at the end of the day, we’re in it together—fiery moments and all.πŸ’ž